Euphoria .

Wednesday, November 27, 2013 @ 6:20 AM with 0 comment(s)

Trusting someone is scary stuff.

Because you don't know how genuine they are.

It's scary because if you trust someone and you find out that it's all a lie, that they were gossiping behind your back, that there were things about you which they actually find irritating and annoying but pretended to like, that at the back if their mind they smirked at your flaws which you genuinely thought they accepted. When you find out all the moments you spent together were forced out of a motive, be it to their gain or out of pity.

I'm not saying this because I have done it before. But I've seen this happening to others around me. Where they gossip about each other and yet act so openly and friendly around that person.

And some days, you just can't imagine how anyone can accept you for who you are.

I hate being insecure. It kills you and the relationships around you.

Insecurity forces you to have the second thought before starting that conversation.

Before opening up. It forces you to doubt the most innocent intentions. It causes you to overthink.

I'm just scared ok? I'm just scared of getting hurt by people who mean the world to me. By people who give me happiness, but afraid that I can't give that back to them, even worse am causing them the exact opposite. I'm scared of finding out that what causes the happiness was all a lie. The people I love and treasure are all just. Not really there. That it's all a mask.

I'm sorry. I'm just really overwhelmed by emotions now. It's been a long day and hormones are high. I've been seeing too many of these kind of things and I'm just tired.

And I'm sorry if you feel like this post refers to you, because this really isn't to anyone in particular.

I honestly do treasure each and every relationship I have, and I hope you believe that.

xx,